I want to revisit this because it dawned on me about a week ago that although you can and maybe will contract a disease I personally have never met anyone that has nor has my partner.
In all the years we have been swinging not one little bit of information has come back to us that someone caught an STD.
In fact the only time I hear about it is on the news or on TV and a Doctor. That's it.
Friday, April 29, 2011
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
About me
I was born many long years ago and survived birth to be raised by a mother who was an alcoholic and a dad that worked different shift and who I was so very scared of. I have no reason for that fear and in later years spent a great deal of time laughing and joking with him, but as a child I wouldn't go near him.
My mother was the one that really scared me quiet. I kept my mouth shut around her because I didn't want to get yelled at. Were my sister and I beaten, well spanked would be a better word but in those days parents were allowed to spank and we the children learned not to do anything to get a spanking for, course with an alcoholic parent they don't need reasons.
I grew up without a parent home all the time because they both worked. My mother for our local church, the one we attended and my dad for an oil refinery. I am sure we had a babysitter, I vaguely remember one here and there, so guess my sister and I weren't alone, alone, but still we did pretty much what we wanted. The only rule I can remember clearly (I don't remember much) is we had to be home by 5 so we could all eat at the dinning table. Yup in those days we ate together.
I cut my index finger with a butcher knife while trying to cut open and orange and it was my sister that took care of me until my mother came home to take me to the doctor. It was my sister who was home when my periods started. Thank god for that, she is 3 years older than me so knew what to do.
Putting all the bad stuff aside I really didn't have it so hard I just thought I did. My mother believed in taking us places. We went to the circus every year, we went to the Ice Capades when they were in town, later when I was older we went to the Rodeo's and to plays, and out to dinner and on driving trips and on vacations, so I had a lot of different kinds of entertainment, plus being allowed to roam pretty freely, to the beach, to friends, to the local stables where I would spend the day, to the movies or down to the Pier.
All of which I suppose looking back made me in part what I am today.
My sister and I made a chose not to turn out like my mom, so neither one of us became an alcoholic. I love to laugh, I believe in being honest, telling the truth as much as possible, I don't believe in hurting people on purpose. I hate shopping in any form, I love fresh air and I am an animal lover. I am extremely open minded and accept more than most people seem to. I hate talking on the phone. Absolutely hate it.
I am extremely quiet but that doesn't mean I am dumb, in being quiet you learn to listen to what is going on around you, so you pick up information here and there and store it away. That helped in the writing of the book, all that stored information I had and really didn't realize it until I started on the book.
Sexual things, (whatever the things are) doesn't surprise, or shock me. I might not want to do certain things but I don't condemn them either or the people interested in doing those things.
Life is life, you either go with the flow or you don't.
My mother was the one that really scared me quiet. I kept my mouth shut around her because I didn't want to get yelled at. Were my sister and I beaten, well spanked would be a better word but in those days parents were allowed to spank and we the children learned not to do anything to get a spanking for, course with an alcoholic parent they don't need reasons.
I grew up without a parent home all the time because they both worked. My mother for our local church, the one we attended and my dad for an oil refinery. I am sure we had a babysitter, I vaguely remember one here and there, so guess my sister and I weren't alone, alone, but still we did pretty much what we wanted. The only rule I can remember clearly (I don't remember much) is we had to be home by 5 so we could all eat at the dinning table. Yup in those days we ate together.
I cut my index finger with a butcher knife while trying to cut open and orange and it was my sister that took care of me until my mother came home to take me to the doctor. It was my sister who was home when my periods started. Thank god for that, she is 3 years older than me so knew what to do.
Putting all the bad stuff aside I really didn't have it so hard I just thought I did. My mother believed in taking us places. We went to the circus every year, we went to the Ice Capades when they were in town, later when I was older we went to the Rodeo's and to plays, and out to dinner and on driving trips and on vacations, so I had a lot of different kinds of entertainment, plus being allowed to roam pretty freely, to the beach, to friends, to the local stables where I would spend the day, to the movies or down to the Pier.
All of which I suppose looking back made me in part what I am today.
My sister and I made a chose not to turn out like my mom, so neither one of us became an alcoholic. I love to laugh, I believe in being honest, telling the truth as much as possible, I don't believe in hurting people on purpose. I hate shopping in any form, I love fresh air and I am an animal lover. I am extremely open minded and accept more than most people seem to. I hate talking on the phone. Absolutely hate it.
I am extremely quiet but that doesn't mean I am dumb, in being quiet you learn to listen to what is going on around you, so you pick up information here and there and store it away. That helped in the writing of the book, all that stored information I had and really didn't realize it until I started on the book.
Sexual things, (whatever the things are) doesn't surprise, or shock me. I might not want to do certain things but I don't condemn them either or the people interested in doing those things.
Life is life, you either go with the flow or you don't.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
What others lacked
Reading other books gave me an insight into what I wanted to add. In all the other books that I read they said condoms were used but for us the parties and couples we met didn't use them for the most part.
Both men and women didn't like them and so decided not to use any. I was given lots of reasons why but the main one was the feel. Some people were allergic but most were not.
It seemed to be a fatalist look. If I don't think about it, then I won't get and STD and these people were in the over 40 group.
For my partner and I we chose not to use them. Was that a stupid move, of course it was and I could lie here and say that I was allergic to the rubber but what it really was for me a conscious decision not too. Mainly because of my age. I have had children and want no more, I was also with my last partner and knew it. He made the choice for feel. We made the decision together and we both knew that just one person could have given us an STD.
Also we found out that most people will put down in their profiles that they are disease free and want the same. Don't believe that, Please. For the most part it isn't true. They may be disease free at that moment but if you don't get tested on a regular bases then you don't know for sure. If you require someone that is disease free then you're going to have to ask them for a paper to prove it.
Both men and women didn't like them and so decided not to use any. I was given lots of reasons why but the main one was the feel. Some people were allergic but most were not.
It seemed to be a fatalist look. If I don't think about it, then I won't get and STD and these people were in the over 40 group.
For my partner and I we chose not to use them. Was that a stupid move, of course it was and I could lie here and say that I was allergic to the rubber but what it really was for me a conscious decision not too. Mainly because of my age. I have had children and want no more, I was also with my last partner and knew it. He made the choice for feel. We made the decision together and we both knew that just one person could have given us an STD.
Also we found out that most people will put down in their profiles that they are disease free and want the same. Don't believe that, Please. For the most part it isn't true. They may be disease free at that moment but if you don't get tested on a regular bases then you don't know for sure. If you require someone that is disease free then you're going to have to ask them for a paper to prove it.
Monday, April 4, 2011
How I came to write a swingers book
My partner and I are swingers and one day after a party I had this bright idea that he should write a book (he is a published writer) about the swinging lifestyle.
He didn't want to do it then and told me I should give it a try, well I really didn't want to, I am not a writer. I can type yes, I can do research, I can not spell well (thank god for spell check) and I don't know a thing about punctuation, but he kept telling me to give it a try, so finally I did.
I asked one of the hostesses from a party we frequent to collaborate with me and she accepted but then dropped out after a couple of months but by then I was on a roll. I loved the researching, and the idea's were just flowing out of me.
My partner and I bought some swingers books and looked through them to see what they had written and found everyone of them lacking and slightly skewed in favor of swinging and really didn't broach the ins and outs of The Lifestyle, so that is what I decided I should do, tell the truth.
I decided that my book should have all the ins and outs and be as in depth as possible without my putting to much of a swing (pun intended) in favor or against. It is informative and to the point but I am sure that I have forgotten to add things, and that some others might have idea's so this blog was started.
The Ins and Outs of the Swinging Lifestyle
And In Depth How To Guide
Was started a few years ago, put on a shelf to rest for a few months then re-started then stopped and started yet again until now.
You can find the book at: Amazon and Smashwords.
He didn't want to do it then and told me I should give it a try, well I really didn't want to, I am not a writer. I can type yes, I can do research, I can not spell well (thank god for spell check) and I don't know a thing about punctuation, but he kept telling me to give it a try, so finally I did.
I asked one of the hostesses from a party we frequent to collaborate with me and she accepted but then dropped out after a couple of months but by then I was on a roll. I loved the researching, and the idea's were just flowing out of me.
My partner and I bought some swingers books and looked through them to see what they had written and found everyone of them lacking and slightly skewed in favor of swinging and really didn't broach the ins and outs of The Lifestyle, so that is what I decided I should do, tell the truth.
I decided that my book should have all the ins and outs and be as in depth as possible without my putting to much of a swing (pun intended) in favor or against. It is informative and to the point but I am sure that I have forgotten to add things, and that some others might have idea's so this blog was started.
The Ins and Outs of the Swinging Lifestyle
And In Depth How To Guide
Was started a few years ago, put on a shelf to rest for a few months then re-started then stopped and started yet again until now.
You can find the book at: Amazon and Smashwords.
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